💔 Refusing a System That Watches You

🧓 Aging & Refusing

Now I’m 63. People ask: “Why don’t you just go back on social assistance?”

Because I remember:
- how my mother was treated
- how I was treated
- how my child could have been taken

Because poverty should not be a punishment. Because survival should not cost your dignity. Because I have already paid too much.

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⚠️ The System Isn’t Broken — It Works Exactly As Designed

It is designed to:

• 🟥 Keep people terrified
• 🟥 Keep families in chaos
• 🟥 Keep women desperate
• 🟥 Keep elders powerless
• 🟥 Keep trauma inherited

And then society wonders why:

• ⛺ Tent cities everywhere
• 🧊 Overdoses at bus stops
• 👶 Children taken into abusive care
• 👵 Seniors dying on sidewalks

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❓ Reflective Questions

1. What would you do if you lost a parent at 11 and the government threatened to take the rest of your family?
2. What if you worked 11 years until your body broke down — and then no one cared?
3. How would you feel if you had $22,000 in debt after 4 years of school, only not to be employed because of pregnancy, the dot‑com crash, or 9/11?
4. What if parenthood meant risking losing your child to the system?
5. Why are women punished for pregnancy but blamed for not working?
6. Why are seniors discarded when they’re no longer “profitable”?
7. Why are the most personal details demanded online when every major system has been hacked?
8. Why does “help” feel like surveillance, not support?
9. Why do we criminalize people trying to survive?
10. What if this happened to your child? Your mother? You?

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🎥 The New Surveillance: Job Interviews as Evidence

Today, almost every job interview is a video interview. And that means:

• 👀 They capture your face
• 📍 Your home
• 🔊 Your voice
• 📂 Your emotional reactions
• 🧠 Your trauma responses

What happens to that recording? Who is storing it? Who can access it? How long does it follow you?

The same government that demands deeply personal data online, now pairs it with your visual identity — forever.

If you are:
- disabled
- older
- racialized or Indigenous
- visibly poor
- traumatized
- desperate

…that video becomes evidence against you, not your worth.

This is another reason I refuse. Not because I don’t want help — but because help has become surveillance.

Some of us understand the system too well — and that terrifies them. People like us don’t fall into line. We question. We expose. We survive. Systems built on control don’t know what to do with survivors. So they hope we: 🕳️ disappear, 🧍‍♀️ give up, ⚰️ or die quietly. But we are still here. And we are not silent.

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🔥 We Must Demand Change

• 💥 Raise social assistance rates to meet real costs of living

Surviving the System: Childhood

💔 Surviving the System: Childhood to Parenthood

They always watch you. From your earliest trauma to your hardest decisions, the system waits for weakness. Not to help — but to control.

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👶 Childhood Trauma

I was 11 years old when my father died by suicide. 💔 My mother — devastated and alone — went on social assistance to keep us alive: me, my brother, and sister, ages 11, 13, and 16.

“Get a job or we’ll take your kids.”

That fear bonded itself to my bones — proof that help always comes with a threat.

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🔧 A Working Life, Cut Short

I worked 11 years in a hard, physical job. 💪 Until chronic tendonitis forced me to stop.

I returned to school as a mature student, paying for everything myself. I had a $15,000 credit rating, built on years of hard work. 💳

The program was supposed to be one year, but the college canceled programs repeatedly, turning it into four years. I had to keep reapplying for student loans — a trap designed to put students further in debt.

Then came the dot‑com crash and 9/11. 💥 I lost it all — my savings, my credit — because student loans defaulted.

And then… I found out I was pregnant at 40. 👶 A joy I have never regretted — but the trauma surrounding it was relentless.

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🍼 Pregnancy Under Surveillance

I returned to Canada pregnant. No one would hire me — visibly pregnant women were seen as a “burden.”

So the same system that once threatened my childhood now demanded compliance:

• “Prove over and over again that you’re poor.”
• “Give us your private information or you don’t eat.”
• “Comply or we will punish you.”

Every appointment felt like an interrogation. Every form felt like a confession. Every month felt like a test of worthiness to survive.

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💔 Forced On, Forced Off

They cut me off when my child was only 3. ❌ I scrambled to survive.

Then my mother — my mentor and protector — passed away. 💔 Grief forced me back into that system at 4.5 years old for my child, facing the same harassment my mother had endured.

Caseworkers didn’t see a parent doing everything for their child. They saw a file number, not a person.

Hospitals, offices, forms, checkboxes — all eyes on us. 👀 Even when I was doing everything right, they looked for reasons to punish.

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🧸 Covid, Childcare & Career Barriers

During Covid, no one would hire me as a nanny — even though I had just finished a 2-year contract in 2019. 🕰️ I was in my late fifties, and because of the age difference, I was seen as “too old” to be near a child.

💔 How many relationships, families, and careers were destroyed during this time? We are all living with this trauma, yet the system quietly brings in newcomers, finding them homes and jobs, while long-time residents are blocked at every turn.

One of the reasons I was so late having a child was no affordable childcare, leaving me trapped and waiting.

And because of all this, I had to change my career again. Now I have no tickets, no elder care, no ECE, no first aid, no food safe — all of the certifications and qualifications required to work, even though I laboured and educated myself for years.

Stay tuned for next post

When Compassion Triggers Cruelty

 Tina Winterlik: When Compassion Triggers Cruelty

(October 2025)

Yesterday, I shared a post that said, “Being homeless is a full-time job.”
It struck a chord with me — because it’s true. When someone has no home, every single thing becomes harder. Finding food, staying warm, looking for work, protecting belongings, staying safe — it’s exhausting. Survival itself becomes a full-time job.

I didn’t expect that post to stir up what it did.

A woman I knew — not very well — texted me shortly after I shared it. Then she called. She said she wanted to know if I wanted to work at a market selling nuts. I thought it was a little strange since it wasn’t even her business — she said she was calling for her boss. Something about it just felt off.

At first, I tried to be polite. But the conversation quickly took a turn I didn’t see coming. Out of nowhere, she started saying awful things about trans people — hateful, cruel, and full of judgment. She called them vicious and obsessed with sexuality. I was stunned.

It broke my heart because I’d just been talking about compassion — about understanding what people go through — and here she was, tearing down others for being themselves. I froze. I had shared personal things earlier in the conversation, and suddenly I wished I hadn’t.

The whole thing left me shaken.

This woman is 67. She told me she retired in 2019, but she’s still working. So she likely gets a full pension and still earns income — yet instead of using that privilege to lift others up, she used her time to judge and belittle. And I can’t help but wonder: why?

Maybe it’s fear. Maybe it’s bitterness. Maybe some people, even after a lifetime of working, can’t find peace inside themselves — so they try to control or diminish others.

It reminded me of another moment years ago. A woman I knew a long time as acquaintance, always wearing her usual purple outfits, bright and eccentric. One day, before Trump was elected, she said, “He’s not a racist.” I remember my stomach twisting even then. I pulled away and never spoke to her after that. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised this time either.

Still, I was. Because I always want to believe people can grow.

But what I learned — again — is that you can’t predict who will turn hateful when the topic shifts to something real. Some people hide their prejudice behind politeness or humor until they feel safe enough to let it spill out.

Yesterday reminded me of why empathy matters so much — and how fragile it can feel when met with cruelty. But I refuse to let that kind of energy change who I am. I’ll keep standing beside love, acceptance, and truth.

I share stories about poverty, homelessness, injustice, and human rights because I believe in connection, not division. We can’t solve anything if we’re busy attacking each other’s existence.

So to anyone reading this who has ever been dismissed, judged, or hurt just for being who you are — please know: there are still people out here who care deeply. People who see your struggle. People who want a better, kinder world.

Because the real full-time job isn’t being homeless —
It’s surviving a world that has forgotten how to care.

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💬 Reflection Question:
When was the last time someone’s cruelty caught you off guard — and how did you keep your heart open instead of closing it?

💭 Quote to Remember:

“Stop working your shit out on other people.”
— Brené Brown

— Tina Winterlik 🌍💜

The Job Market Myth: Why Articles About “Hundreds of Jobs” Are Misleading

 

By Tina Winterlik (aka Zipolita) and AI

January rolls around, and like clockwork, articles start circulating about "hundreds of job opportunities" waiting for eager applicants. Sounds promising, right? But for someone like me, a 62-year-old with decades of education, experience, and a mountain of student debt, these headlines couldn’t be further from the truth.

Let’s break down the reality behind the hype.

A Misleading Picture

Writers employed by media outlets churn out articles touting an abundance of job openings in cities like Vancouver. They make it sound like opportunities are endless and accessible to all. But here’s the catch:

Many job postings require recent certifications or niche skills.

Automated portals reject resumes before they’re even reviewed by a human.

Competition is intense, with thousands of newcomers and younger candidates in the mix.

These articles rarely acknowledge these barriers. Instead, they perpetuate the myth that anyone who wants a job can get one—as if the problem is the job seeker, not the system.

The Harsh Reality for Older Job Seekers

Ageism in the workplace is real. Despite years of experience and proven adaptability, older applicants are often seen as:

Overqualified: Employers assume we’ll leave at the first better offer.

Outdated: They think we lack tech-savviness or flexibility.

Too expensive: Our experience is viewed as a cost burden.

And let’s not ignore the suggestion that we "just need to upgrade our skills." For someone in their 60s, with debt and no guarantee of success, how is that realistic?

Automation and Rejection at the Gate

Most resumes never reach an actual person. Applicant tracking systems filter submissions, discarding anyone who doesn’t perfectly match keywords or criteria. Even when I do make it through, rejection emails—or worse, complete silence—are the norm.

The Hidden Impact of Competition

Vancouver is a beautiful city, but its job market is fiercely competitive:

Newcomers with sought-after skills often take priority.

Younger workers are seen as cheaper and more "trainable."

Many jobs are part-time, low-wage, or precarious—hardly sustainable for someone nearing retirement.

The Privilege of Writing About Jobs

Let’s be honest: the writers who publish these job market puff pieces aren’t struggling. They have jobs, stability, and likely no idea how disheartening it is to apply for hundreds of positions only to be met with rejection after rejection.

A Call for Honesty and Action

It’s time to stop pretending the job market is a level playing field. Writers and media outlets have a responsibility to tell the full story, not just cherry-pick statistics that sound good.

For older job seekers, the conversation needs to shift:

Recognize the value of experience and adaptability.

Address ageism and systemic discrimination.

Provide pathways for meaningful employment without forcing costly and unrealistic "upgrades."

If you’ve faced similar struggles, I encourage you to share your story. Together, we can challenge the narrative and push for change.