art against stigma: sometimes the freak flag just needs to fly

 art against stigma: sometimes the freak flag just needs to fly

I'm currently participating in an art exhibition called Art Against Stigma, and I've been thinking about what stigma actually means.

Sometimes we think of stigma as something big: discrimination, prejudice, exclusion or outright cruelty. But stigma can also be found in everyday situations. It's in the assumptions we make about people, the labels we attach to them, the expectations we place on them and the way we decide who belongs and who doesn't.

I recently watched a movie that got me thinking about all of this.

a movie recommendation: the family stone

If you haven't watched The Family Stone (2005), I recommend it.

On the surface, it's a family comedy-drama about a woman named Meredith who accompanies her boyfriend home for Christmas to meet his family. Things don't exactly go as planned.

The family doesn't particularly like her. She feels judged, uncomfortable and increasingly unsure of herself. But there's another side to the story: she's judging herself, too.

Then Ben, her boyfriend's brother, sees something in her that she hasn't quite recognised herself.

He tells her she has a freak flag. She just isn't flying it.

I loved that.

How many of us spend our lives trying to fit into somebody else's expectations? How often do we hide the parts of ourselves that make us different because we're afraid of being judged?

Perhaps the answer isn't to change who we are. Perhaps it's to let our freak flags fly.

there's more to this movie than christmas

What I particularly enjoyed was how many different subjects the movie brings into the conversation.

Cannabis stigma. The mother disapproves of marijuana, yet later we see other family members enjoying cannabis. It's a reminder of how attitudes change, although even though marijuana is legal in Canada, the stigma surrounding its use hasn't completely disappeared.

Deafness and communication. One of the brothers, Thad, is deaf, and he is gay. His partner Patrick is Black. Their relationship is simply part of the family, but it also gives us an opportunity to think about the assumptions people make about disability, sexuality and race.

Many hearing people don't know sign language or how to communicate comfortably with someone who is deaf. Sometimes the barrier isn't the deaf person. It's the lack of understanding and accommodation around them.

Indigenous history. There's even a conversation about a village and totem pole raising, bringing history into the mix. Indigenous heritage and cultural property deserve recognition, respect and protection.

And those shoes! I had to smile at this one. Even footwear becomes a source of judgement. Women are still expected to dress and behave in certain ways. High heels, appearance, clothing and manners all come with expectations about what it means to be a proper woman.

It's amazing how many rules society creates about how other people should live.

what does stigma look like?

Stigma can surround disability, mental health, addiction, sexuality, race, homelessness, poverty, appearance, age and even the choices we make about how we live.

Sometimes people are judged before anyone has bothered to get to know them.

Sometimes people internalise those judgements and begin believing there's something wrong with themselves.

And sometimes people simply need someone to see them differently.

That's one of the reasons I appreciate this movie. It doesn't need to deliver a lecture about acceptance. It gives us a family full of imperfect people, complicated relationships and uncomfortable conversations.

Nobody is entirely free of judgement.

And perhaps that's something worth remembering.

art against stigma

My participation in Art Against Stigma is important to me because I believe art can open conversations that might otherwise never happen.

My Water Is Life collection includes whales, mermaids, otters, waves, forests and hummingbirds. These paintings are about our connection to the natural world, but art can also be a way of expressing things that are difficult to put into words.

I don't believe we have to be the same to respect one another.

We don't have to understand every choice someone makes to recognise their humanity.

We don't have to agree with someone to treat them with dignity.

And we certainly don't have to fit into somebody else's idea of who we should be.

Maybe we could all use a little less judgement and a little more curiosity.

And if you have a freak flag, perhaps it's time to let it fly.

Art Against Stigma. Because everyone deserves to be seen beyond the labels.